A longtime guilty pleasure of mine– well, not so guilty in more recent years, and not guilty at all now– is the Super Mario Bros. movie. Explaining why is difficult to do, though I’ve been known to attempt it now and again. Part of it would be that, at the time, it was an “edgier,” more “realistic” Mario that was cooler to my young mind; now, I just enjoy it as one facet of Mario’s long 30+ year history, and see it as essentially the “Sonic SatAM” of the franchise (albeit without nearly as many rabid fans).

This all led me to recently be looking through the books section of the Super Mario Bros. The Movie Archive, where I looked over the Golden coloring book based on the movie. I had seen the book before, but never really looked at it page-by-page.

Well last night, that happened to change, and I was a little surprised and amused by what I saw. For one thing, the art is actually kind of… good. It reminds me of a classic comic book-style, in a way, but with a sort of simplicity to it– a necessary concession, if you’re expecting kids to color it, after all. Plus, some of the scenes are a bit different, likely to make the story a little easier to follow in this format.

Anyway, I’ve picked out a selection of pages here which really stuck out to me for one reason or another. Some are goofy, some are creepy, and some will just make you ask “what the honk?”, but with more profanity. So join me, if you will, as we relive the magic and the wonder of Super Mario Bros. The Movie… in coloring book form.

This is the first shot of the Bros. Unlike the film, they wasted no time getting the two into their red/green and blues. Which makes sense for a kid’s coloring book, when you think about it.

What the–?! What's going on with Luigi's lip?!

All said, Mario seems to be taking things a lot better than Luigi… which is funny, because in the movie, it was Luigi who was all about how "you just gotta believe, Mario!"”

The movie’s break-out star, Stun Gun Granny, looking more dynamic here than ever.

“Bah gawd, King! Big Bertha has Stun Gun Granny up for the Gorilla Press Slam! She’ll break her clean in half!”

And off she goes! I always thought those Thwomp Stomper boots looked like a ton of fun, and now I know! If I hadn’t already been completely sold on them, the look on her face here would have done it for me.

Now this part is interesting. Just like the movie, Toad is put in the chair of the de-evolution chamber, albeit with a bit less cuffing-in-place involved. And then…

…good grief! They didn’t turn him into a Goomba, like the film! They de-evolved him into a puddle of slime!

And then Koopa sits in him! Well, okay, he was shoved, but all the same…

(In the movie, there was a scene cut showing another victim before Koopa got shoved in there, so at least that much is consistent. The best part? His name is believed to be “Wart!”)

I just love the look on Koopa’s face here. You’d expect him to be screaming, but instead, he’s just steaming. You an almost imagine his eye ticking as a result…

Epic putting-on-boot action! Because the scene every kid wants to color is Luigi trying on new shoes.

…no comment. I’m not even sure what’s going on here, so just… just draw your own conclusions about this one.

I think the power of the meteorite piece is that it gives whoever holds it a really detailed face.

Is it me, or does this one seem a little bit… I don’t know… lewd?

As the worlds merge, remembering to tip your waiter has never been better advice.

“Honey, this love seat we ordered doesn’t look anything like the one in the catalog!”

“Damn you, IKEA!”

And to conclude, here is Koopa getting blasted straight into goo. Granted, that’s how he ultimately ended up in the movie, but there was a little bit of T-Rex in-between first. Somehow, seeing him melted right out of his suit seems more brutal.

Making it even funnier is that Tyranno-Koopa was featured on the book’s first page, yet we never see him like that anywhere else throughout.

These were just some of the pages from the book, but you can check the entire thing out in full at the Super Mario Bros. The Movie Archive, and even save the pics to color on your computer, if you wish! There’s also plenty of other fun and enlightening things from the movie all over the site, and they even have their own forums.